How to Use Asparagus, 1568

John Gerard, The Herball (1636)

Asparagus cooked with wine alleviates pain of the loins and kidneys, provokes urine, loosens the stomach, and frees the liver and kidneys from attacks, especially the roots and seeds. But if asparagus is used too much, it brings great harm, since it expels urine quickly, and irritates the bladder, which is bad. It is believed to incite lust… asparagus is a helpful food for a man, especially a newlywed having trouble in bed with an eager spouse: if at first he is unable to please his wife, this will allow him finally to have a sweet and loving partnership.

Hugo Fridaevallis, De tuenda sanitate

Ah, springtime, the season of love: the birds, the bees, the newlyweds gobbling asparagus…